AmeriKa: They Ran Out Of New

America’s REAL PROBLEM is they have run out of new…In short, there is no new shit to buy and there hasn’t been for some time. In a nation where mindless consumption is the religion and mandate of the State, you need new shit on the shelves and you need it all the time…America has run out of ideas. Not surprising since it ran out of literacy a long time ago.

[Editor’s Note: The following post is by The Dollar Vigilante legal correspondent, Jim Karger]

It is a 10 hour high speed burn from the blistering shit hole of Laredo, Texas to the cool, high desert air of San Miguel de Allende, Mexico. I know that because I just returned last night. Indeed, I still return to the USSA regularly, either hauling dogs to their new forever homes for Save A Mexican Mutt, or to battle the government and labor unions on behalf of clients to whom I still can’t say “no.”

Each time I return to San Miguel, I breathe a sigh of relief. This is really home now, and more than missing it when I am gone, I feel relieved when I return. The reasons are numerous but worth a brief review before I get to the real problem faced by those north of the border.

The decaying infrastructure in the United States slaps you hard across the face these days, the roads getting noticeably more dangerous each trip. Lady Bird Johnson, wife of the war criminal Lyndon Johnson, would roll over in her grave today if she saw the state of the medians on Interstate highways. She was all about beautiful highways, and I wish Lyndon had focused on those, too, rather than killing 60,000 American kids in Vietnam and an untold number of Vietnamese. In the end, they both failed. The USSA lost still another war and the median grass and weeds along Interstate 35 are now waist high in a lot of places.

Still another visible problem is the transmogrified police state where slow-pour mean-spirited cops threaten anyone who doesn’t publicly kiss their ass and then kill their dogs on videotape just to get their point across. Texas robo-cops are now strip searching good looking girls on the side of dusty country roads while hillbilly cops in Arkansas are making decent folks spit in a machine, then testing it and arresting them for any number of possible offenses, all of which involve ingesting substances the State is pissed off they can’t tax.

These are indeed problems but they are not THE problem, the one that makes me want to flee anytime I find myself on a long stretch of heavily patrolled highway or imprisoned in a dank airport waiting for another late plane.

It is not even the open and apparent hostility welling up in an entire population of serfs that can go something like this . . .

“Excuse me, ma’am, why is the flight late today?” I asked cordially in my soft southern drawl.

“Fuck you! How’s that for a reason, shithead!” she gritted through clenched teeth, obviously pissed at her poor vocational decision.

“Sit down and shut up like all the rest. I have your name right here,” she snapped, “and I can eliminate your privilege to fly forever by just pushing this button.” She smiled menacingly while pointing at the “f” key on her filthy Dell keyboard.

“I am so sorry you are having a bad day, ma’am,” I whispered, feigning care, compassion and concern, and then gently touched her shoulder. “May I do anything to help you?”

She froze and then looked up at me with tears in her eyes. “I had a rich one once,” she whispered loud enough for most everyone near the jetway to hear. “I bagged him when I was young and pretty. I really should have let him fuck me in the ass.” The gate became ghostly quiet with that comment and even I was momentarily speechless.

“I figure that’s why he left me. I wouldn’t take it in the poop chute,” she offered sincerely.

“I am sure that was it,” I agreed, “but we all make errors in judgement, even me,” I offered modestly. At that moment she broke down completely, told me I was “different than all the rest,” and gave me a first class boarding pass with someone else’s name on it. “Fuck him!” she snickered. “Fuck all of them.”

Service lapses like these are indeed problems, but not THE problem, at least not for me.

Obesity is also an issue in AmeriKa, and like highway medians, it is in your face, up close, and personal. Americans die younger and experience more illness than people in other rich nations, despite spending almost twice as much per person on health care according to a new study by the US National Research Council and the Institute of Medicine. While infant mortality, the rate of teen pregnancy, traffic fatalities, and gunshot wounds all play a part, it is heart disease that dispatches most Americans to their forever dirt naps and most of that results from the stress of living as a fat ass on a couch watching the public relations arm of a fascist State on LED while eating a sleeve of Pringles. The US Council on Foreign Relations, a nonpartisan think tank, described America’s fatness as “a catalog of horrors.” But I didn’t need to read the study to know that. There is plenty of anecdotal perspective available. Just go to any Wal-Mart between Laredo and Dallas where the fatties are brain dead until they run short of dollar cookies and electric scooters at which time things can and do go sideways.

But not even obesity is the real problem.

No, America’s REAL PROBLEM is they have run out of new.

In short, there is no new shit to buy and there hasn’t been for some time. In a nation where mindless consumption is the religion and mandate of the State, you need new shit on the shelves and you need it all the time.

Think about it…

Personal computers were once new. They changed the world. But that took place 25 years ago, and they are so old now that few even use them anymore except for the MacBook Air that designates one as cool in any Starbucks.

The iPhone 5 is a ho-hum mobile phone with a tiny computer that you need an electron microscope to read much like the first iPhone.

Even the Internet is getting old, now a cumbersome unfiltered garbage can of innuendo, slander and full-bore lying.

Name one new recreational drug that made a difference since Ecstasy. I rest my case.

Liquor stores are still filled with cheap gin, the only change being that some is now sloppily poured into expensive bottles.

Wal-Mart still has a corner on the shit market for everything no one really needs but can afford to buy to mask the pain of being a failed consumer. And there is GroupOn which is a relatively recent model servicing those who want to buy shit that won’t sell at retail. But discounts on crap are hardly new.

Not even porn has changed, not for the better. I went into the New Fine Arts adult film and toy store in Dallas (to research this article, of course) and, you guessed it, same old dildos, vibrators, and lube. Nothing new except the labels and the prices. That said, I admit that the shaved muff has improved the visual experience. While we can chalk another one up for the resilience of pussy, bare is hardly an earth mover.

Bottom line: Two-thirds of the American economy depends on Americans being jazzed enough about something new to go into terminal debt slavery to own it. But there hasn’t been anything new that really changed anything for most Americans since the first iPad. and most Americans can’t even afford one of those.

I project that there isn’t going to be anything new. Not now. Maybe not ever.


America has run out of ideas. Not surprising since it ran out of literacy a long time ago. The only decent jobs that are left are in banks where the rich figure out how to rob anything the poor and middle class might still own, and lawyers who are getting excited about haggling over the ruins. The rest are baristas, hotel maids, bartenders and prostitutes, and even the world’s oldest profession has hit hard times. There is simply too much leg space available at rock bottom prices to make a case for a bull market anytime soon. Wild whores and brutal pimps have both seen their better days.

America has devolved into a collection of Detroits, each waiting their turn. I mentioned this fact to a richy sitting next to me in the Admiral’s Club in the Dallas Ft. Worth airport last week. He winced and then smiled nervously, “No worries. I live in an exclusive gated community where neighbors help each other.” I smiled knowingly, leaned over and whispered, “When the shit hits the fan, amigo, you will be lucky if your neighbors don’t nail your doors shut and burn your house down with you in it.” His face was a mask of terror and I could tell that he knew I was right. When the consumer fails to do his duty, the entire shit-er-ee will come down, the currency will collapse, and no amount of paper will buy anything. Most will be unhappy, and most of the unhappy have guns.

So, what makes Mexico and a few other Latin American alternatives different? For sure there is nothing new here, and if there is anything new, it is old news north of the border. What is different is attitude about new. In the land of family, fiestas and tequila, no one cares about the next big thing. It simply doesn’t matter. It is all about living for the sake of living, to notice the sky, the air, to appreciate family, friends, and to value today, this day, now.

picJim Karger is a lawyer, and frequent contributor to The Dollar Vigilante, who has represented American businesses against incursions by government and labor unions for 30 years. In 2001, he left Dallas and moved to San Miguel de Allende in the high desert of central Mexico where he sought and found a freer and simpler life for him and his wife, Kelly, and their 10 dogs. He is TDV’s San Miguel de Allende concierge and his website is found at

Jim has been not-so-quietly dreading the day he would receive the news of my disappearance at the hands of the US government. He was thrilled to find out I’d be traveling to Chile to help out with the Galt’s Gult project…and reminded me to swing by his guest casita in San Miguel after I escaped the land of the unfree.

You can find out more about being Jim’s guest yourself in beautiful San Miguel — perhaps the first step in a permanent move to this popular expat city –when you sign up for TDV’s paid subscription newsletter to gain access to TDV Groups, here.


Gary Gibson Editor, The Dollar Vigilante

About Land & Livestock Interntional, Inc.

Land and Livestock International, Inc. is a leading agribusiness management firm providing a complete line of services to the range livestock industry. We believe that private property is the foundation of America. Private property and free markets go hand in hand—without property there is no freedom. We also believe that free markets, not government intervention, hold the key to natural resource conservation and environmental preservation. No government bureaucrat can (or will) understand and treat the land with as much respect as its owner. The bureaucrat simply does not have the same motives as does the owner of a capital interest in the property. Our specialty is the working livestock ranch simply because there are so many very good reasons for owning such a property. We provide educational, management and consulting services with a focus on ecologically and financially sustainable land management that will enhance natural processes (water and mineral cycles, energy flow and community dynamics) while enhancing profits and steadily building wealth.
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4 Responses to AmeriKa: They Ran Out Of New

  1. Gunny G says:

    Reblogged this on DICK.GAINES.AMERICAN! @ Gunny G's… Since 1997 and commented:
    Dick G


  2. NEO says:

    Reblogged this on nebraskaenergyobserver and commented:
    There is quite a bit of truth in here. The language is maybe NSFW but still truth is truth, and Americans aren’t exactly know for our delicacy. So read and learn and most of all think. Because the only way we’ll solve our problems is by thinking it through, that’s how we got here in the first place. Hat tip to


  3. hoboduke says:

    Enjoy the nostalgia of 1970’s use of AmeriKa! Don’t think that’s new? Anyway, the future of our country is happening without waiting for commercial news media to report. The future of our country is happening without waiting for some speech by Obama on how he made this happen. The shifts in demographics is the explosion in population with the millennial generation having larger families. People are not waiting for the politicians in any country. Look at Egypt that did not follow Obama’s suggestion they should retain fanatical Morsi. Their population is millennial and don’t care to wait for the old politicians. There is a great vitality. I don’t care about pot holes, lines of people at Trader Joe, or planning my future on food stamps and an Obama phone.


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